The Birds and the Bees
by MyHikari
Summary: After deciding their son Shinachiku needs "the Talk", Naruto and Sakura get a little distracted by their own memories.


A/N: Ok, so I promised a oneshot for my readers to make up for a long break. I got two responses, so here I am, cobbling them together in a beautiful and (hopefully) unique mishmash!

NaruSaku fan from Kentucky requested Naruto and Sakura's son getting the talk, while Masen Lakain requested Naruto and Sakura having a workout session.

This fic will feature Shinachiku, the fanon NS baby. Woo!

* * *

"What's wrong, Shina?" Sakura asked, walking into her home and seeing her son sprawled out across the couch, a miserable expression on his face. Her spared her a glance and sighed, sitting up.

"It's nothing really."

Naruto poked his head out of the kitchen, shaking his head. "He won't talk to me, Sakura-chan. I think he's at...that age."

Picking up what Naruto was putting down, Sakura raised an eyebrow curiously. "Are you having girl trouble, Shina?"

The blonde boy's face quickly grew scarlet, but he crossed his arms and tried to deny it as casually as possible. Unfortunately for his parents, none of his siblings were around, as they would quickly blow the boy's cover.

"It's not Sasuke's kid is it, because I don't wanna end up related to that jerk!" Naruto insisted, receiving a glare from his wife.

"No, it's not Ama-chan, Dad."

"I don't think it really matters who it is," Sakura said, looking pointedly at her husband to follow along, or else. "What matters is if you're being safe in your relationship!"

"Ahh, Sakura, I don't think he's really having that sort of trouble.." Naruto cut in bashfully. Shinachiku looked absolutely miserable at the prospect of having this awkward conversation.

"I'm not even with a girl, Mom," the boy began lamely.

"How much do you know about having safe sex?" Sakura asked, her tone not unlike a doctor to a patient.

"Enough from school.." Shinachiku said, looking anywhere but at his mom. He even silently pleaded his father to save him. "Can't I just read a book or something?"

"You can't ask a book questions," Sakura replied evenly, sitting on the coffee table in front of him. "It's more relatable between people."

"Speak for yourself," Naruto muttered, recalling the horrifying talk Jiraiya's gave him about a hundred times.

"I don't have a girlfriend, why does it matter?!"

"While you might soon, besides, not everyone has sex while in a relationship," Sakura said. "Some people like to hook up casually."

"Cuz I'm totally the type for that," the 15 year old deadpanned sarcastically, unconvinced.

"Sometimes it just happens," Naruto said, joining in despite himself. He met his wife's eyes across the room, smirking very slightly. Her tiny flush signaled that she did, in fact, remember.

* * *

 _Naruto sighed, pretending to spot Sakura as she lifted weights. They were working out in the Jonin gym together, very innocently, but Naruto was felt as if he was being tortured. He couldn't stop tracing the beads of sweat rolling down her body, nor stop looking at her exposed stomach. Her wet hair clung to her face, and her eyes were set in a look of determination he just found absolutely appealing._

 _Sakura also was feeling tested somewhat. She had suggested this excursion, clearly not expecting anything like this. They'd talked about their feelings when the war ended, and decided to take some time to just hang out and see where their feelings took them. It wasn't anything official, they weren't dating, but suddenly, this activity oozed sexual tension. She hadn't noticed it until she watched the muscles in his arms and back move, and it started feeling overwhelming when she noticed his gaze was on her as much as hers was on him. She looked forward, not daring to sneak a peek._

 _She cursed inwardly when she couldn't help but glance at him for a second, before sitting up and accepting the towel he handed her. "I think I might be good for today, Naruto."_

 _He stretched, trying to keep himself occupied, and nodded. She cursed inwardly again, as she couldn't look away._

 _"We should, uh, maybe get some food or something?" he asked awkwardly, trying to change the situation, but not quite ready to stop being around her. They began walking to the locker room, as Sakura chewed on her lip, seeming distracted. This in turn distracted him, to the point he almost walked into the doorway._

 _"Sure," she finally replied, headed to the locker she put her bag in and heading to the women's showers._

 _Naruto groaned watching her go, cursing the fact she probably wasn't aware of much her hips swayed._

* * *

Shinachiku blinked, looking at the smirks his parents exchanged quickly, thinking they were sly. "You guys are gross."

Naruto sputtered. "What're you talking about, Shina?!"

"I noticed those sly looks, Dad. If you're trying to make this conversation less awkward, you're totally failing," he said, scrunching his nose in disgust. The kid was way too perceptive, really.

"Shinachiku, this isn't about us, this is about you being safe," Sakura huffed, trying to save the conversation.

"This is so weird," he practically whined, as his mother inadvertently confirmed what they'd really been thinking about.

"Don't rush into anything, and always use protection," Naruto stated, caving in at the sight of his son's embarrassment. "That's all for now, you can go now."

"Thank goodness," the boy exclaimed, leaping up from the couch and quickly heading upstairs.

"Thinking of the gym showers too?" Naruto asked mischievously, meeting his wife's gaze. "Can you imagine what would've happened if anyone was there that day?"

"You were lucky the women's shower stopped working," she replied coolly, standing to embrace him. Unfortunately, Shinachiku hadn't seemed to quite be out of earshot yet, as a yell down the bannisters surprised them.

"Stop talking about it!"

Hearing a door slam, Naruto turned back to his wife with a grin, waggling his eyebrows. "Do you think it would be in poor taste to-?"

"Yes, Naruto. It would."

"We could go back to the showers."

"Probably shouldn't."

"Can't blame a man for trying. I guess I'll go try to find him a book or something," Naruto said with a smile, starting to head upstairs.

"As long as it's not one of Jiraiya's," Sakura retorted, heading into the kitchen to fix a snack.

* * *

A/N: Well, kinda short, but hey it's a thing. I hope you all enjoyed, sorry again for the long hiatus!

I feel I should say this isn't a personal headcanon of mine as to how Naruto and Sakura got together, but it fit the prompts, so...yeah.

Later gators,

MyHikari


End file.
